Gross

6 hours already and the memory of the salty taste still gets to me. It makes me want to puke. Yet at the same time it was also fun and interesting. Not to mention I have bruises on my knees and lower back.
But I feel bad that he feels bad. Apologetic. Made use of him in a way, got him to ask me because I wanted it. Personally I'm mostly kinda past feeling guilty already. It nags at me sometimes, but it's possible to actually shut it off in that aspect. But him, he still has feelings, he's still a very normal person.
One-off thing only, he says. I nodded but only half-believed it. I wanted more.

But thinking about it now, if it's so uncomfortable for him, one-off thing only it shall be.

I seriously am my own destruction.