Reorient

I decided I needed to reorient my life, so erm, I'm leaving this blog for a while. Difficult to say what will happen to it lah, hor. I always say close it but it is still open now, so I'll just leave it here. Feel free to re-read my entries =P

Love all of you! *hugs*

A leaving quote to make you all laugh, as seen from my friend's MSN nick:

The 7 dwarfs were feeling happy, so happy left.

Another blog, another name, another identity. Anonymity, maybe for a while, maybe forever.

October

October. It will be the time of change. After October, I won't be able to ask him out again.

Statistics makes me happy

I know this will sound very weird.

Statistics really make me very happy. I think math in general makes me very happy. But I'm not very good at them both and very often I am confused and blur when trying to analyze them, but it's nice to deal with them anyway.

So yar, statistics make me happy.

Good guys

"Let's not do it anymore," he said.

Suddenly I realize he's really a good guy, and I don't know what to do. To a certain extent, I don't like good guys, because they make me feel bad about myself. And I have a soft spot for good men.

On the other hand... thank goodness there are good guys around, because I feel like perhaps things can work itself out and be alright again.

Happy

Had a wonderful, wonderful time today. Haven't felt like this before after a session. Superbly happy! Ah, now I feel so much better and a lot less stressed out!

The one that can be limp and hard

This post is M18. Please skip or close your eyes if you are scrolling downwards and do not wish to taint your innocent mind.

Since this blog readership has dropped from half-a-hundred to a tenth of a hundred (or two-tenth of a hundred) nowadays, I think it is now safe to make a completely random, half-way sexual and absolutely factual comment:

I never knew penises when not erected can be so different in size from when they are.

I was absolutely amazed. Its soft state is simply cute and kinda funny.

Ok, that's all. You may open your eyes now.

Lazy

Me is lazy girl.

Me miss exercise, perspiring and that sense of adrenalin.

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday to my friends who are born in July and August, those I remembered and those whose birthdays I forgot! Here's a birthday song for each of you, especially for Jeremy, whose birthday is today.

The Birthday Song - Corrine May



Heh, actually accidentally found this song and found it beautiful.

Regret; males

Told a friend today - Don't do things, or not do things, that you will regret in future.

I wonder anyway, when we do things that we regret, is it not a learning experience? For it is because I have at least once regretted that I have learned to appreciate the full meaning of this sentence. Perhaps it is more a case of accepting your past mistakes and learning from them than anything else.

-------------------------
It is harder nowadays to say "sorry". Harder nowadays to forget. Harder nowadays to trust men. Even harder to trust that I want to be near a guy because I like him and not because I just want some male comfort.

Ok, actually I just want some comfort. Why is it that we can't rest our heads on the shoulder of a male who's just a friend. I mean sometimes a guy's fun to hang out with and I feel comfortable, so sometimes I'm tempted to just give him a hug or lean on him for a bit, but as a friend and not because I feel affection for him in that way. It's the same way how I'd put my head on a female's friend shoulder or hold her hand or lean against her. But we can't do the same thing with guys, so I'm mostly reduced to patting their arms -_-'''
Talk about being touchy-feely.

Ok, maybe other people can do that but I find myself unable to although I want to. One reason of which is because I don't trust myself enough. I shall stop here.

Disconcerted

This isn't the first time it had happened, but it still feels a little disconcerting, how this whole thing is.

Ah well, I guess it isn't that big a deal. And I'm happy for my friend. =)

I need chocolate

I ate a chocolate muffin today because I was under pressure.

Now I need more than just chocolate muffin because my photoshop trial expired and I have a poster to rush out and I absolutely suck at designing; I have 30 (and counting) photography entries to collate on this extremely slow computer; I have not prepared for lesson tomorrow.

If you have seen this "Capturing Climate Change Photography Competition" in your NUS mails with that film-like logo, yar, that's the one I'm supposedly in-charge of. I made the logo too, but my friend did the actual poster. I told you I suck at designing.

Anyway, if you're interested in the photography competition, check out our Green Carnival website for the details. Prizes are pretty good and you don't need good photography technique - just lots of creativity as well as a decent camera which gives you a picture of minimum 500kB. You just need to tell us What Climate Change Means to You through the photo, a title and a short description.

Competition ends today at 2359 and I'm very strict about the 2359.

If you're not interested in the photography competition, you can check out the website for other stuff like free movie screening. Do also come down next Monday to Wednesday, 25th - 27th August to the exhibition at Central Forum for exhibits on environmental issues, especially climate change.

You can go look at the photos on display at Central Forum and vote for your favourite ones too!

Yar ok, now I have to go figure out a way to design a poster on MSWord, study, collate the entries and then sleep, all in one night.

My fingers hurt.

Good day

It is a good day today.

Odd how a single thing can make an overall bad day into a good one, isn't it?

My friends gave me the nicest smiles today. =)

Irritated

Am incredibly frustrated and irritated. Attributed it to my oncoming period though I do not remember being exceptionally so during this period of time.

Come on, keep your cool!

Snore

I woke up suddenly this morning and heard myself snore. A gentle, consistent snore. No wonder my throat feels weird.

Shucks, did I snore on the bus too?

That "dear"

Arzhou has "dear =)" as his gchat nick. After teasing him about it over a week or so, I have reduced to saying,

dear
hahahaha

Which kind of sounds wrong.

Sometimes I am unbelievably childish.

Engine raring

I am finally ready to start being busy again. Some rest I had, abandoning tasks assigned to me. Or maybe I just needed to warm-up. In any case, it feels good.

In love

I'm in love. Utterly and completely.

2 days after the end of SingBellz Fest still found me unwilling to commit myself to any sort of serious work (other than the current day-job I have). The photography competition is officially out (NUS students should have received the email by now - please do participate in it), the backdrop of the stage needs to be designed and the accounts from the festival needs to be closed. It seriously feels as if a month of my life force is drained and I need some time to recuperate.

All I have been doing ever since Saturday is to glue my eyes to the computer screen, watching animes. Just this Sunday, I went on a 7-hour anime marathon.

After watching this particular romance-comedy anime, titled Itazura na Kiss, a sweet feeling entered my heart and is lingering till now. Coupled with that fantastic sensation of playing handbells with others, sometimes producing music that makes my hair stand, I decided that this high is the sensation of love. It makes me feel as if I'm not alone and that with it, everything will turn out fine.

Haha, and everybody was asking me who is it I'm in love with, when what would have been more appropriate.
As for who is it, well, isn't it still the same person. For reasons I don't know and don't comprehend anymore.

And after going one big round, I think I finally found myself finding back the control I once felt, although it seems a little different, if it has changed somehow. The basis of it all, however, still remains the same.

A lot of things to talk about, discuss and advertise but am recently not in the mood to do so. Work tomorrow. Good night.

Stressed

Suddenly I sense a huge burden descending. Getting increasingly stressed with each passing day.

Just spent 3 hours on ticketing stuff. What the heck, I'm super slow. Now I can feel gastric pains hitting me for no particular reason. Ok, have to go to bed, tomorrow's another long day. Good night.

Random note: I crave for instant noodles.

Talking at break-neck speed

From Mr. Goh, whom I surveyed today and finished in a record time of 25 minutes,

It felt like you were rushing somewhere and I had no time to think like that! Hahaha!

Surveying and talking with random strangers can be surprisingly fun!

Predator

Yanwei says I'm a predator.

All unsuspecting cute boys watch out! Steph is on the prowl! Get out before you
get "crushed"!

-_-''' Thanks, Yanwei.